The Five Functions of Behavior – Now What? Access to Tangible Items
“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. ”
Almost every time I am in a store, I hear at least one child throwing a fit because they want something. We have all been there. Our child sees an item on the shelf that they suddenly, desperately need. You say no and they start throwing a whopper of a fit in an effort to get you to give it to them.
These moments happen many times a day for most parents with neuro-diverse or uniquely challenging kiddos. It is painful. It is exhausting. But there is hope!
When your child exhibits unwanted behavior in an effort to gain access to some tangible items, what can you do? Is there any hope? Yes!
1. Provide access to a variety of activities and items that your child is interested in. This allows you to motivate your child to act appropriately without giving in to their immediate request.
2. Reward your child for accepting “no.” I don’t mean give in! I mean, positive reinforcement for managing their behavior when they don’t get what they want. Positive Reinforcement - What Is It and How to Successfully Use It. Accepting disappointment is a practiced skill. The more they practice, the easier it will be later without the reinforcement.
3. As a general rule, control access to tangible items. A child should not be allowed to, for example, go in the pantry and choose whatever they want to eat; or have free access to electronics; or consistently be permitted to pick something up in a store and have you purchase it. Provide choices based on what you are willing to provide. They should be required to choose from these items and not ask for others.
4. Teach your child how to make reasonable requests. This seems like it would go unsaid, but our society is so used to getting whatever we need and want without request, that many kids are not learning what it means to “ask.” This skill can be taught through Social Stories, pretend play and modeling. When my children ask me appropriately, they may not get what they want, but they always get positive reinforcement for their good behavior.
5. Delayed satisfaction. Teaching them how to earn. We often take pictures of the items Claudia finds in the store and thinks she NEEDS. We then talk about how maybe she can work toward earning these items. If she remembers the item by the time we get home, we will make a sticker chart and figure out the necessary tasks she must perform to earn it.
6. Positive Consequences. “We are not going to get that now, but if you put it back and act appropriately leaving the store, we can talk about how you might be able to earn it.” Or something like that. Getting them in the habit of asking for something, hearing “no” and controlling their behavior should be rewarded!
Next:
Determine the function of your child’s behavior.
If you believe their unwanted behavior is due to lack of access to tangible items, try the above strategies.
Don’t be in a hurry. Some of these behaviors can be stubborn.
If you find that these don’t work, consider another function of behavior.
More:
Why is she acting like this? The Five Functions of Behavior
The Five Functions of Behavior – Now What? Escape
The Five Functions of Behavior – Now What? Attention
The Five Functions of Behavior – Now What? Automatic
The Five Functions of Behavior – Now What? Control